MANUAL TEAMWORK, LEADERSHIP AND NEGOTIATION
TEAMWORK, LEADERSHIP AND NEGOTIATION
understand what they are saying.
9.9.2. Project or reflect the consequences
This requires going a little beyond the content of what the other person is saying, and indicating to the speaker that he or she is aware of the direction the content is pointing in. It can take the form of an amplification or explanation of the speaker's ideas, using phrases such as:
"I guess if you do this you'll be able to...". "That can lead to a situation where...".
• •
• "Would that help to solve the problem of...? • "How does what you are saying help our situation?
When projecting or reflecting consequences it is important to leave the speaker in control of the discussion or conversation. When this technique is used to change the direction of the speaker's thinking or to demonstrate that the listener is much smarter, it disrupts trust-building and becomes a negative resource.
9.9.3. Reflect underlying feelings
This technique goes beyond the overt content of what is being said, and brings to light some of the feelings, attitudes, beliefs or values that may be influencing the speaker to speak the way he or she does. The aim is to empathise, to put oneself in the place of the speaker, to experience what it must feel like to be in their situation. The listener then tentatively expresses the feelings, using phrases such as:
"I guess this worried you a lot."
•
• "If that happened to me, I would be deeply upset". • "Sometimes, when I've been in that kind of situation, I've missed help. • "If I could do that, I think I'd be really proud. • "That must have given you great satisfaction."
In reflecting underlying feelings, sensitivity is needed so as not to over-expose
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